I think I’m in a slump. It started in January and continues to impact my heart and mind. I shouldn’t be surprised by this part of recovery, but I am. Slumps are normal whenever a person needs courage and discipline for the long haul. It is no easy thing to recover from addiction. Recovery is a moment by moment tug-a-war between who I want to be and the addict I have become. I wonder if I visualize the person I want to be, then I will better lean into the struggle of becoming that person.
In baseball every hitter will have a slump. Most of the time, it is more mental than physical. Yogi Berra once said, “Baseball is 90% mental, and the other half is physical.” Poor hitting performance starts with the batters thoughts and visualization before stepping into the batter’s box. Hitting coaches encourage a player to stay positive and believe in himself, no matter the circumstances.
So it seems it will do no good to dwell on the negative aspects of losing my sobriety. It would be a better use of time and energy to contemplate what I can learn from the past few months through the up and down nature of recovery. The graph for recovering from an addiction is not a straight line but looks more like a graph of a bull run of the stock market. Over time the direction is up, but there are up days and there are down days.
Feeling sorry for myself nor getting discouraged after a setback will not help me stay sober. Dwelling on the mistake won’t either. Remembering that a failure can be a great teacher and saying to myself, “I am confident I can stay sober,” are better ways to end a slump.
A Recovery Pilgrim 